“We have to run,” I said to the spokespigeon. I pulled a thick knife out of the back of a toga’ed ladybug man. The AI spoke up. Et tu, Brute? That blade sure looks good at backstabbing. Are we foreshadowing a future betrayal? I sprinted north, the pigeons followed. The speed and the rushing wind took me. Ivan: Hey I just unfroze too! Where are you guys?             Carol: Follow the carnage and then keep heading north.             Ivan: Okay. Wait up for me.             Carol: We can’t. Earl would catch up. We’ll find some [...]

The razor-sharp claws of a roachie slashed down across my left shoulder. The Spokespigeon pecked the claw before flying away doing no damage to the monster. I fell to the stone floor, next to me was the ball-and-chain pigeon. I grabbed his chain tail swinging him over my head while getting to my feet then hurled him towards the roachie in front of me. He smashed through his head, dismembered pincers spinning through the air. I bolted through the gap running down the hallway. I hoped the pigeons would follow but they reveled in the [...]

The door swung open with speed slamming into the wall. The collision echoed through the large empty marble corridor. The ground was covered in gore. Lifeless bodies in contorted positions. Faces tainted by their final moments of pain and fear. Intestines snaking out of spear wounds. One crawler in pajama pants, no shirt, stared glassy eyed at his arm three feet away, fingers reaching for the other hand as if to reattach to the body. Around them, was a pond of shiny red made even more macabre by the silence. No living monster nor human [...]

Crawler Courageous jumped to his feet. “Looks like it’s settled. We’re all one big happy family.” “You are not our family,” the spokespigeon firmly stated. “If the love of my life, Carol is with you then so am I. We’re a package deal.” Cornelius turned in his chair, his elbow accidentally hitting over his notepad. “Carol, do you mind picking that up for me?” I bent over to get the pad, in large letters, all underlined, it said, provoke him to hit you. Quietly, under his breath, “trust me.” Cornelius pleaded. I took a second [...]

Grinning directly at me, Crawler Courageous slipped on his ring. Holding up my ring so he could see, I mentally stashed it in my inventory like Cornelius showed us. It disappeared from my hand. The pigeons stared impassively. Cocking their heads to the right when I ‘pocketed’ the wedding band. One pigeon walked forward, the others stayed where they were. Looking up at me, “thank you, you gave me the biscuit,” he said. “I am in your debt.” “Well, if I’m being honest, I didn’t know it would do that. I’m glad you’ve achieved sentience [...]

“If you want to live,” Cornelius said. “Do whatever you have to do to survive to floor 3. At 3, you can finally allocate all the points you receive from leveling up as well as pick a class and start developing your own niche style of fighting that best suits your abilities. Does anyone here have any loot boxes?” I raised my hand. So did Earl and a few others. “For those who didn’t raise their hand, the exit is over there, time to go back out to the dungeon and start earning your right [...]

Across from me, both hands flat on the table, Earl stared into my soul. Deadpan. A raw red cut was slashed across his left cheekbone. I stared back but looked away when he broke into a joyless smile. I tuned back into the tutorial. After a brief awkward silence, Cornelius started his lecture, “look, a lot of what I say will seem like magic, but it’s just technology beyond your understanding. Easiest thing to do is to not ask why or how and just go with it. Now, back to the inventory system…” “Wait,” said [...]

The entire audience was tuned in on the edge of their seats. Hands shot up. “We’re not answering any questions at this time, but we would like to point out how undisturbed you all are to be in the presence of aliens but perk up for a dopamine hit of fame. Most bathrooms will be equipped with mirrors if you would like to do some self-reflecting.” The PowerPoint continued going over things like how to control the announcements that flashed before my eyes, we learned about instant messaging chat features and the inventory system. “And [...]

New Achievement! Extreme apathy!             You’re unbothered by being thrown into a murder dungeon and coming face to face with aliens and monsters. Seriously, we’re measuring your heart rate and blood pressure, you didn’t spike a bit. What’s wrong with you?             Reward: One free therapy session with me, the AI, at a time of your choosing.   Holding the teacup with both hands I reveled in its warmth breathing deeply letting the fragrance overwhelm me in hopes of finding the eye in the storm. My eyes were closed tight. “You probably have a lot [...]